Only 2 more "sleeps" until our big ultrasound!!! I'm so excited and anxious at the same time to know what this *Lovebug* is... I'm ready to be calling him/her by their name instead of referring to it as "the baby", especially now that we have names solidified.
I have felt so just down and blue lately that it's really starting to bother me. I just can't seem to shake this depression and I'm afraid it's only going to get worse when the baby is born, although at least then I can start taking an antidepressant, I'll feel alot more "normal" then. It really is a generational struggle in our family, both of my grandmothers and my own mother have struggled with depression and anxiety issues, it's not even so much emotional as it truly a chemical imbalance.
I've decided that perhaps I need something more constructive to do with my time, something to distract me a bit more so I've started looking for a part time job or volunteer position to start. I would rather it be paying, but at this point I just need something, anything really and the extra play money wouldn't be so bad either ;) This really is the most relaxed and slow paced life I've had since before high school. When I graduated I went straight to working 60-80 hour weeks and then when while Micah was in Iraq I worked and volunteered like a mad woman in an attempt to occupy myself and make the time go faster. It really did work, when he got home I barely realized that it had been 7 months.
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